Daily Ten - Week Eight

Below is the eighth week of my daily ten observations. To learn more about my daily ten, and read the observations that came before these, you can read all previous posts here.

TEN. FIFTY.

1. That song is the first thing I want to listen to when I wake up in the morning. I am trying to pinpoint what it is about it. I go over the lyrics line by line, lose myself in the melody and the tenor of his voice. 

2. My toes are almost bare. The last of the paint is chipping and fading. 

3. She's becoming much better at managing her time in the morning. I hope we can transfer these skills to her afternoon habits. 

4. I could get used to this.

5. Too soon. Too soon.

6. I break down and call them and they tell me things I already know, but it feels good to hear them say it. 

7. I ache all over.

8. I am trying to let myself have this time and not judge myself for taking it.

9. "I just don't want to be bothered." I know how he feels.

10. "Love the life you live. Live the life you love." I put those words on the wall to be a reminder, but I am so used to them being there that I walk by without really seeing them anymore. 

 

TEN. FIFTY-ONE.

1. You can be this happy. You can be this loved. 

2. It's a little darker this morning than it has been. The color of the sky is not quite blue, but not quite not blue.

3. I have gone back and forth on this, over and over again. Sometimes I want all of the photos and sometimes none, but I woke up feeling very strongly that I should document this.  

4. Two out of three earthside and one in the belly join me for breakfast.

5. "Don't belittle your empathy." Patrice King

6. The universe is giving me what I need today. 

7. I appreciate her candor. 

8. I could talk to him for hours and many times I do. 

9. Each parent gets a shiny red apple from the teacher because "parents are teachers too." What a nice touch. 

10. My body is tired. 

 

TEN. FIFTY-TWO. 

1. September is always a busy month. It is not my intention to pack it so tightly, but it always happens. Maybe it's just the season. Maybe I'm preparing for the coming winter. 

2. Her face remains smooth and impassive,  but her hands give her away. 

3. Even with everything available to him at school and all the friends he has to play with, he still cherishes his time here.

4. Maybe the universe makes us uncomfortable so that we are more welcoming toward change when it comes. 

5. Why do I think they are judging me? What do I think they see when they look at me?

6. "Sometimes naming a thing - giving it a name or discovering its name - helps one to begin to understand it." from Parable of the Sower by Octavia Butler

7. I think I feel like we should go, just because we've always gone. It feels good to break the compulsion. 

8. Give them something fun to listen to. Teach them something new. Tell them a story. I think I can do this. 

9. It's not exactly the way I envisioned it, but I think I can get used to it. 

10. He says he feels like he should get me more spontaneous gifts, not always for a holiday or a birthday, but for no reason at all. I wonder if he knows that he is a gift. 

 

TEN. FIFTY-THREE.

1. One loud beep and then silence. The lights are out in the hallway, but still on in our apartment. 

2. He has all of his Playmobil firefighters lined up on the windowsill, watching their real life versions and the trucks lined up on our street. 

3. I look to their faces to gauge the seriousness of the situation. One yawns and rubs his eyes. Another two smile and engage in what looks like playful banter from the outside. 

4. I take a deep breath. The air smells fresh and free of smoke. The trucks leave our block one by one and don't take anyone with them.

5. The excitement of seeing all the trucks is still coursing through him. He is extra lively this morning. 

6. The tension crackles in the air around us, but we don't speak of it. We just let it fizzle and fade. 

7. I like to be of use. I like to feel like I am useful.

8. Coconut milk. Almond milk. Turmeric. Black pepper. Cinnamon. Honey. A splash of vanilla. I'm delighted that they enjoy this so much. 

9. This ice feels both good and painful in turns. 

10. "In all things of nature, there is something marvelous." Doesn't that mean there is something marvelous in all of us?

 

TEN. FIFTY-FOUR.

1. Yesterday felt like summer's goodbye. I woke into a morning that whispers autumn.

2. I don't feel prepared or ready, but I remind myself that I always feel this way, and in truth there is no way to be fully prepared - I don't know that you are every entirely ready. 

3. Earthseed: The Books of the Living. How did she create something so timeless? Something that feels so eternally true?

4. "Sometimes writing about a thing makes it easier to stand."

5. 77% humidity and I feel every bit of it. 

6. Something is frustrating him, but I think it would do more harm than good to interrupt him and ask him what it is. 

7. I am doing my best to keep track of everything, but sometimes I fall asleep trying to remember what I'm sure I've forgotten. 

8. My feet are so warm. It is impossible for me to feel cool when they are so hot.

9. Sweat.

10. I could have stayed in that water all night. I could have gone to sleep in it and spent all of tomorrow there too. 

 

TEN. FIFTY-FIVE.

1. I keep having this feeling when I wake up. Did I actually sleep or was it my imagination. Did I dream that I stayed up all night?

2. We are stepping into new and unknown territory, but I must embrace the discomfort. 

3. Early morning conversations that are continuations of late night discussions. 

4. The gap between what is explicitly states and what is implicitly meant. 

5. I feel the blessing in the busy-ness today. 

6. I am trying to do some things that make me uncomfortable so I can do some growing. 

7. Perhaps this is just what I needed - this shift of focus, this change of direction. My mind feels refreshed. 

8. Something about them knowing she belongs to me, without my having to tell them, makes me feel good. 

9. I'm glad I did this. 

10. I hope every day this week feels as good as this one. 

 

TEN. FIFTY-SIX.

1. I like when we begin the morning laughing together. 

2. The light is soft this morning. It looks like a rainy day, but there is no rain on the forecast. 

3. Writual Blessings. Shuffle. Draw the thirteenth card. Draw the third card. The first. The ninth. These are the numbers I am drawn to today. 

4. "All that you touch, you change." Octavia Butler

5. The sky can't seem to decide if it wants to rain today. I know what that feels like. 

6. I feel like I don't have time to take a nap, but my body has decided I will make time. 

7. I like the feeling of being taken care of, even though I don't like to think of myself as someone who needs taking care of. 

8. I am honored that she thinks something about my life is worth documenting. 

9. Simple. Relevant. Enduring. Distinctive. Memorable. Adaptable. 

10. He is having a moment with his father.